14 Problems Girls With Box Braids Totally Get
Box braids are a great protective style. They’re low maintenance, versatile, and fun. That said, they can come with their own unique set of challenges. Which should come as little surprise because to an extent, beauty ain’t always pretty. Whether the braids are tight enough to give you a facelift, or you’ve got a scalp that looks like the North Pole, having and maintaining great-looking hair isn’t always a breeze. Below, a few problems anyone who’s gotten box braids can relate to.
#1- Never Being Able to Eat Soup or Ice Cream Without Pulling Your Hair Back
There is nothing more annoying than finding a few synthetic strands sitting in your ramen. And no, you don’t want to swallow those.
#2- Getting an Instant Face-Lift You Didn't Ask For
Who needs to spend money a plastic surgeon when you’ve got your local braiders?
No, they don’t offer painkillers or anesthesia, but at least you won’t have to take out a loan to pay for it all.
#3- Having to Moisturize and Wash Your Face in an Upward Motion
Who needs to spend money a plastic surgeon when you’ve got your local braiders?
You should be doing this anyway, but you quite actually have no other choice when your braids are so tight that even the slightest swipe downward feels like you’re tearing your hair from your scalp.
#4- Having the Braider Laugh at You When You Say She's Braiding Too Tight
Who needs to spend money a plastic surgeon when you’ve got your local braiders?
When I said I wanted my edges to be snatched I MEANT THAT METAPHORICALLY.
#5- Having an Ongoing Headache for Two Days
The pain is especially infuriating when you’ve pleaded with your braider to please, for the love of Mother Mary ease up on the tension. And the worst part of it all, is you can’t even rub your temples.
When I said I wanted my edges to be snatched I MEANT THAT METAPHORICALLY.
#6- Having to Wash and Condition Your Own Hair or Face the Horror of Getting it Combed Out Dry and Having Your Entire Soul Snatched Out
Braiding salons aren’t exactly celebrated for their bedside (chairside?) manner. These ladies will seriously have your hair snap, crackle, and popping like that scene in “How to get away with Murder” when Annalise Keating’s mother was combing her hair. The thought of it makes me cringe. But seriously, you can use a detangler to comb out my hair — you don’t need to do it dry. Oh, and can you please use a wide-tooth comb?
#7- Dealing With Clueless Co-workers Asking How Your Hair Grew Overnight
No, Linda, I didn’t take vitamins and I don’t want to explain how extensions work. Mostly because it’s not that difficult and also Google is a thing.
#8- Not Being Able to Fit Your Hair into a Bonnet, Scarf, or a Dodge Neon
Not only are box braids heavy once you put them up, you can forget about slinking into small spaces. But if you need a big bonnet, these ones right here might help.
#9- Getting Your Hair Pulled by Every Small Child and Kitten You Come in Contact With
It’s like you become a human tetherball beam…and you can’t even be mad because they’re so cute and don’t know any better.
#10- Never Being Able to Get Your Bun to Sit Like Beyoncé’s Did in Cuba
There aren’t enough YouTube tutorials in the world, but for some reason, you keep trying. Every time you think the bun is going to stay looking perched and pretty, it flops right back down to remind you that you will never be Bey. As if you didn’t already know. It’s like you become a human tetherball beam…and you can’t even be mad because they’re so cute and don’t know any better.
#11- Having to Throw an Impromptu Slumber Party Just to Get Someone to Help You Take Your Braids Out
…And then you realize that with money you spent on Rosé bottles to bribe them, you could have just gone to the salon and had a braider do it. But look on the bright side, at least you’ll all be drunk.
#12- Never Quite Being Sure Whether You Got All the Flakes Off Your Scalp
The pain is especially infuriating when you’ve pleaded with your braider to please, for the love of Mother Mary ease up on the tension. And the worst part of it all, is you can’t even rub your temples.
#13- Hearing Your Older Relatives Make Stupid Jokes about “Poetic Justice” Over Holidays
Braiding salons aren’t exactly celebrated for their bedside (chairside?) manner. These ladies will seriously have your hair snap, crackle, and popping like that scene in “How to get away with Murder” when Annalise Keating’s mother was combing her hair. The thought of it makes me cringe. But seriously, you can use a detangler to comb out my hair — you don’t need to do it dry. Oh, and can you please use a wide-tooth comb?
#14- Worrying That Every Stray Braid You See on the Street is One of Yours
It doesn’t matter if it’s a different color, texture, or size, if you see a box braid laying around you immediately start checking the back of your head. Issa reflex.
